End of an Era

Several weeks ago, we began the end of breastfeeding.  It started with a week of really low milk supply.  When I tried the things I normally try when my supply was low (more sleep, more food, more water, more feeding) & they didn't work, I thought I was pregnant.  That's one of the reasons I came to terms with the possibility of having another baby sooner than later. 

But I started my period a week later.  I decided that perhaps I was sooo low because of something hormonal with PMS.  Whatever the reason, that week I unintentionally began the process of weening Isaiah.  My supply came back probably stronger than before, but we kept giving him formula during the day at the babysitter's. 

I wanted to make it a year.  But...  Work was becoming more mentally demanding.  I needed to sleep less & drink coffee more.  The coffee I think was affecting his sleep, even though I tried not to feed him for hours afterwards.  Sometimes I would forget to eat. 

I pumped once instead of twice during that time & started storing the milk with the intention of continuing a little breast milk when I was completely out. 

For work reasons I probably would have stopped more abruptly, but I still had milk, my baby still wanted it, and I still loved that special time we had together.

Two nights in a row last week, he screamed & screamed because I didn't have enough milk.  I knew the end was near.  I stopped pumping completely during the day.  I would still feed him when I got home...  Until yesterday.  For some reason, towards the end of the day, when he was fussy, and I knew he was hungry, and I tried to feed him, he kept biting me!  Each time, my face became extremely stern, and I said, "No Isaiah, no biting."  And his face immediately (almost before I reacted even) turned into a sad sad face & then he wailed.  I really hate it when he frowns! 

His daddy made him a bottle, and he was happy.  I fed him once in the morning, when I was too lazy to make him a bottle, and I guess he was too sleepy to bite me again. 

Oh Isaiah, I guess you're done with me??  Thanks for making me not feel so bad for quitting.