Television

Sometime in the last few years, I've developed these perceived need to watch something while I eat.  When I was in school, despite how much homework I had, I would always justify watching a quick show on Hulu while I ate.  I just feel that I deserve it or that it's not stealing my time since I can't do much while I eat anyway. 

But sometimes on accident, one show turns into two, or three or four.  I have a record of watching back to back episodes of a show until there are no more or I get tired of it.  This is what I did with Lost earlier in the year.  I got to the current season, and I bored myself into stopping.

I know I have a tendency to get a little addicted, so often I just don't get cable or don't have a TV at all.  But there is this man that lives in my house, and he doesn't exactly agree with that philosophy.  So we have a TV & cable.  And an awesome Blu-Ray player that connects to Netflix. 

In fact, I thank & blame Netflix & Samsung for providing unlimited cheap access to online streaming of an amazing selection of movies, documentaries & television shows.

When I was pregnant, during the last month when I wasn't working & my mom & little sis were taking care of me, it got really bad.  We watched many movies, all of the Glee episodes, and I think 3 seasons of 24 in just one month.  There would have been more, but I got tired of 24, and I realized I should be mentally preparing myself for birth.

In beginning weeks of motherhood, it was even worse, because there was another activity besides eating where I couldn't be productive - breastfeeding.  In the later weeks, another activity - pumping.  This is when I started becoming friends with the DVR.  I love TV, but most of the time, I can't stand commercials.  I watched HGTV until I got tired of it.  There was this season's Design Star & The Next Food Network Star, and my favorite Top Chef (still going).  I watched all the old seasons of Top Chef that they aired.  I also pretty much love everything on Bravo.  

Then somehow, I stumbled upon Nip/Tuck on Netflix.  This show is what I would call the epitomy of a guilty pleasure.  Guilty because I feel that way watching this show with Isaiah in the room.  I'm sure that even though he won't remember these early days & years, somehow the dirty evilness of this show will be embedded into his being.  So I tempted this theory & watched it anyway.  Every season, minus a few that I had seen already years ago.

I just finished yesterday. 

Since I would like to be productive 95% of my time rather than 85%, and since I don't want my little one to develop an addiction to television like his mother, I now need to convince myself that I don't need to watch tv while I'm eating, or breastfeeding, or pumping.  Or after or before I do those things. 

Jewel, you're perfectly capable of reading an article from Entrepreneur while you eat your salad.

Think about your child.

Waiting for the Groove of Productivity

I am not sure if I've figured out the makeup thing yet.  I've tried a few times, and I can definitely tell a difference in the face & the lips.  The eyes still baffle me, even though up until a few days ago, the eyes were the only part I was able to master.  Yesterday I was asked to manage.  I wore a skirt & boots, which I have NEVER done.  I forced my boss (who is the messenger of the Man) to score me every day so I can know specifics about what to improve.  The first day he gave me a 3.5 on a scale of 0-5 (5 being the worst).  Yesterday he gave me a...  "It's good miss." 

I guess I should post a picture of the progress, but not today!!!  Because today, I am not doing anything to my face or my hair.  I am going to gaze out of my huge sun room window at the beautiful sky, but I am not going outside.  I will enjoy it from the confines of my apartment walls.

And I will get some work done.  Hopefully.  I have got lots of work & homework to catch up on. 

I have recently gotten over the fatigue of the first trimester, even though everyone has laughed & responded with, "That's what you think."  But I feel good for now!  I no longer want to fall asleep every time I sit down on my former office chair, my comfy couch named Hattie.  When I have to wake up in the morning, I usually feel great; I don't cling to my bed in agony and pray for just an hour longer. 

This newfound energy is so exciting to me.  I am not ridiculously tired all of the time.  I don't drink anymore, which translates into many things.  The money I save is so brilliant, I wonder how I used to justify spending so much in the past.  The hangovers don't ruin my days & diet.  I don't waste a lot of my time at my favorite bars or restaurants.  I don't have to put in as much friend time anymore, because they all go out & drink, and they completely understand if I ditch them because well, who wants to hang out with the boring pregnant girl? 

It seems like I would have all this extra time to be productive right?  To read all the books I have been neglecting, to pick up the guitar that's been sitting untouched in the corner of my bedroom for years, to write the works of art that have been itching to emerge from my head, to thoroughly understand the ins & outs of Operations & Supply Management, to all of a sudden build my business exactly the way I've been wanting to, to exercise, to cook... 

But you know what really happened?  I've just become obsessed with reading about having babies & being a mommy.  Blogging goes along with that because I get to write & read about it.  Cooking follows suit because I want to have good mommy recipes for my family.  I still have to watch my favorite shows online while I eat & put on makeup. 

Everything else...  Blah.  Even my business, which I'm usually incredibly passionate about!

So what is the cure for procrastination I ask?  Is it to reconnect with the things I love about what I should be doing?  Is it more time, as one friend suggested?  Or is it deadlines?  I read somewhere that a goal means nothing unless you put a time limit on it.  Or does setting deadlines take too much time? 

Perhaps it's time management which I'm trying.  Since all of my work is done at home, I've been asked by the Man to start keeping track of my hours.  Now I am keeping track of all of my hours, work & personal.  Maybe seeing where my time is going will help me allocate it better.

We'll see.  All I know is that waiting for the groove is probably not the best idea.  I think I'll have to work for it.  I'm positive that this struggle is foreshadowing of the work/life balance I constantly hear about entrepreneurs striving to find. 

I guess it's good that my vices are productive things.  Instead of playing video games.  Or reading trashy romance novels.  Or... Shopping.