Things That Have Given Us Peace
Monday, June 14, 2010 at 06:34PM A wise woman once told me that when it comes to your man, you should make a list of all the things you want from him. And then only expect half. And you will be happy.
Said in this manner, I thought this advice was brilliant, although I've always followed a similar philosophy: lower my expectations, and I won't be disappointed as much. I think this originated from my years in theater, when I learned that acting is reacting, and I decided that in life too, your feelings stem from reactions to whatever is going on.
And I've always tried to apply a similar way of thinking to the way I treat other people. Underpromise, overdeliver. If my friends, family, clients expect less than what I actually give them, they will always be satisfied.
Why am I talking all of this nonsense? Because I recently had a revelation. I should apply this philosophy to my son's sleeping habits. I was getting frustrated when we were in bed at night, and he wasn't sleeping when I thought he should be. When I decided to try something new, I moved to the living room, where we could change positions more. I could rock him there, bounce on the ball, just sit on the couch, and sometimes watch TV (he likes the TV now). As soon as I stopped expecting him to fall asleep, our lives became much more pleasant. He's not sleeping more usually (although he did sleep 4.5 hours today!), but we are all happier, especially Marcus, for whom this sometimes means an uninterrupted night of sleep.
Someone else's equally applicable advice: Isaiah is the boss.
There is another thing that has equally contributed to our peace... The swaddle. I heard a lot about swaddling before Isaiah came along, but when he got here, I figured he didn't like it because he screamed & screamed every time we tried to put him in one. And he seemed to really like having his hands around. But after we watched The Happiest Baby on the Block, we decided to give it another shot. It has done wonders. If he is full and fussy still, we swaddle him up & hold him on his side with his back to our belly. He immediately calms. Sometimes we have to adjust him to upright stomach to stomach or rock him or bounce on the ball, but none of these things work without the swaddle.
See, look how happy he is!
