Bed Time

I know that I'm supposed to put my son to bed wide awake at the same time every night.  But I also know that I want to sing to him every night like my mommy sang to me.  Bed time isn't always the same these days because at Nana & Papa's house there is a house full of kids on the weekends.  Instead it's anywhere between 9 & 11.  I used to lie him in my bed & lie down next to him and sing.  But now he's in the crib, and I'm too far above.  So every night at "bed time" I turn off all of the lights, hold him in my arms, and I stand, sway back & forth, and I sing.  Even on his most restless & fussy nights, he rests his head on my chest & listens.  And I rest my cheek on his soft curly hair.  He usually is still awake when I'm done singing, and depending on how tired he is he might let out a few wails as I leave the room.  But if he's really tired, he will fall asleep in my arms.  Like tonight.  It was magical.  And I held him with two hands, tighter & longer than usual. 

Accidental Sleep Experiment

I haven't even looked at this blog since my last post, which I didn't realize until looking now was over two weeks ago.  We're pretty broke because of the thing I can't talk about, so I've been extra motivated to focus on building the business.  Let's just say I'm learning really fast & hard about the legal world.  Because of some drama over someone who isn't Isaiah.  Really sad stuff.  Number one lesson - always have lots of money saved up just in case.  Lots.

We just have to keep reminding ourselves that everything happens for a reason.

And in order to focus on work more, I accidentally discovered a new genious strategy. 

One evening, after picking up Isaiah & arriving home, I was exhausted.  After he ate & I ate & we played a little.  I passed out while putting him to sleep at about 7:30.  We slept for five hours.  It was amazing because it was unexpected nap exactly when I needed it.  I fed him & put him back to sleep.

Then I had to get all my work done.  So I was working & working until about 1am when I thought why don't I just stay up all night?  Because I had to be up around 6 anyway.  I would be exhausted if I tried to sleep & then wake up at 6, then I would probably hit snooze too many times, probably be rushed getting ready (I hat e that) and probably be late everywhere I had to be. 

It was wonderful.  I got so much done.  And I wasn't rushed to do anything.  I took Isaiah to the babysitter's early.  We were early (ok on time may be a better word for it) for work stuff. 

It was so wonderful that I wanted to ignore how exhausted I was while driving and how much extra coffee I had to drink to be 100%.  Then I think it started affecting my milk production.  I was getting more sleep than I would have otherwise, but I think the coffee the new schedule required was hurting too much.

Marcus hates it.  Because it's not normal.  Even though I try & convince him that I'm getting more quality sleep this way.  And I'm enjoying my son more.  When we get home I'm not trying to work while he wants to play.  The little time I have with him these days I'm getting to spend with him instead of trying to figure out new ways to keep him happy while I work. 

See, this is what Isaiah looks like when I'm not playing.  He's so sad.

I've toyed with it more.  I'm going to sleep early (between 8 & 10).  And getting up early (between 4 & 5).  I'm still getting that quality quiet time in the morning, still getting sleep, and still getting to play with my son on his time.  I love it.  Marcus doesn't, but he's sleeping when I wake up so he can't protest much. 

Now back to work.

Speaking of work, this is us at one of my restaurants, Dive, following a photo shoot of their food.  My designer is the best.

Seriously back to work.  And I know that I still have to tell the rest of the wedding story.  Next time.

There is No Baby Yet

Number one most commonly asked question to Marcus...  "Has Jewel had the baby yet??"  And to me, "You're still pregnant??"  We're both a little tired of the questions.  Marcus especially.  He wishes he had a t-shirt that says, "No, there is no baby yet." 

So we've missed the original window to follow the Kipapa birthing tradition, to deliver the males two weeks early.  It was supposed to be the 18th, give or take a few days to leave room for error in the due date.  But nothing.  Upon further discussion with my mother, however, her second boy wasn't two weeks early.  She was only estimating, he was actually 10 days early.  So that means there really was no boys-are-two-weeks-early law.  Instead the proposed law is boys are early.  Girls are on time. 

Isaiah, are you going to follow the rules?

My big event is over, so I'm not stressed about Marcus working it & not being there for the birth.  I told Isaiah he wasn't allowed to come this weekend because of that.  He can't come tomorrow either because I've got a lot of homework.  And I'd really like for him to wait until my big sis comes back from vacation Wednesday. 

But I'll be okay either way.  I'm ready now, but I wouldn't mind a few extra days to mentally & emotionally prepare.  I'm not horribly uncomfortable yet. 

Sleep is different.  I'm still getting it, but occasionally I will have to sleep on the couch sitting up because the heartburn is so bad.  Other than those moments & the annoying bathroom breaks & having to roll over to alleviate my aching hips, I'm lucky to be getting the rest I'm getting.  Naps are my favorite & cuddling with Marcus. 

Went to see Babies tonight with my mom & little sister.  It was just precious. 

Here we are after the show. 

And here is me trying to read & follow my midwife's orders...  Sit on the ball. 

20 Reasons I'm Not Liking Being Pregnant

Yesterday, I got my first dumb comment.  "Wow, you are unusually big for only 4 months!" 

I grimaced at her. "I hear it's rude to tell a pregnant girl how fat she is."

Scrutiny is the reason I haven't yet posted baby bump shots, my weight gain, or anything else about noticeable physical changes.  But today I remembered why I'm doing this blog thing -- most of the reasons are for me -- so I'll never forget the troubling and wonderful details of my pregnancy. 

Here's to all the future "you're so big" rudeness of the next 5 months of my life!! 

My favorite first baby bump shot.  It looks like I'm so pleased with what I'm seeing.  And I'm not.  But I am pleased with what it means.

And now... 

20 Reasons I'm not Liking Being Pregnant

1. Strangers making comments about how big I am.
2. When I sneeze, my belly hurts.  I used to love to sneeze.
3. I'm getting pale.  And I can't fix it. 
4. I’m getting fatter.  (See evidence above)
5. The paleness makes the fat more noticeable.
6. My boobs are too big.  I put on a maternity shirt I bought a few weeks ago.  The buttons at the top barely button now because of my boobs.  
7. The lady at the maternity store told me to buy new underwear in my pre-pregnancy size.  They didn’t fit.  I guess that means my butt is getting bigger too.  Later I went to buy the next size up.  They were too big.
8. I’ve started to exercise, which I’m actually very proud of, but I can’t seem to get my schedule under control.  Sometimes I’m up very early & working all dressed up, and I’m too exhausted once I get done.  So I take a nap then stay up too late.  I think that was 2 in 1.
9. Speaking of work, I need new shirts that fit, but I don’t want to buy them because of what if #4 gets even worse?
10. Also for work I have to wear these boots with heels.  I never liked heels before, but now it’s so much more painful.  Plus I heard that pregnant girls shouldn’t wear heels.  
11. I’ve heard a lot of other things about what pregnant girls shouldn’t wear, eat, drink, put on their skin, put in their hair, etc.  I feel like I need to change everything.
12. I want to have home-cooked food, and I’m okay with cooking it.  I just don’t want to go to the store to get the ingredients.
13. I can't breathe after climbing the three flights of stairs to my apartment, ESPECIALLY carrying groceries.
14. I can’t take naps on Hattie (the couch) anymore because she makes every part of my body ache. 
15. Sometimes (like last night) every part of me aches no matter where I sleep.
16. I’ve got pimples.
17. I definitely have baby brain, pregnant brain, mommy brain, whichever is the proper term.  It’s most noticeable when I’m on the computer.  I usually have around 10 tabs open, researching 10 different things at one time.  Now I can’t even remember why I opened a new tab.
18. I feel sorry for my boyfriend when I get really emotional.  I don't want to be that way.
19. I don't like when I can't do everything by myself.  But I'm having to learn to ask for & accept help.
20. And you know this one --  I have to pee way too much.  On the trip to be considerate to the family members, I didn’t drink anything a few hours before we left.  But I was soooo thirsty!!!  How do you travel long distances with a pregnant girl?

I think that's all.  For now. 

Now I would like to hear about your least favorite parts about being pregnant!  Post a comment & tell me about it! 

I Hate-Love Coming Home

My first two days back from vacation...  So very frustrating. 

This is probably why I never ever go on vacations -- because I hate coming back. 

I have such a hard time, not just getting back into the groove of things, but I have a hard time doing anything.  I miss things that happen at work, I'm behind on school, my outgoing work email doesn't work from anywhere but home so I have all these emails in my head to send, then I have dreams that I'm never going to complete all the tasks that are piling up.

But then there is my bed.

Despite those horrid dreams, all I want to do is sleep in my unusually comfortable bed. 

Are beds on vacation uncomfortable just because they aren't yours??  When I was gone, I was asking my sister if she had trouble sleeping, if every position was worse than the one before, & if her back always hurt.  None of that happened when I got back home!  Yay for me now, but according to my sis, it will start soon regardless of whose bed I'm in.

There were some other wonderful things...

I got to hear my baby's heartbeat again.  It's exhilerating how fast it beats.  They always (4 times so far now) prepare me by informing me that the baby may be hiding & we might got get to hear it this time, but she's never hiding.  She's always right there letting me know that she's okay. 

Another high point...  I got to see my boyfriend after several days of being apart.  I don't care what any of you say (especially him), days away from him are more difficult now than before I was pregnant. 

It's like I'm missing him for two. 

He finally read this email I sent him days ago, a post from Dear Baby, when the father writes after hearing his daughter kick for the first time.  And then instead of saying "Awww..." or telling me how sweet that was, or doing nothing, he got down on his knees & started talking to our baby.  He took turns talking & laying his head on my belly. 

And then we got to cuddle the night away.