How to Survive Without the Internet

My internet has been down for four days.  Four days!!!  I posted on Twitter when it began, "I feel naked.  And alone."  I couldn't do homework, I couldn't work.  I couldn't write my brilliant thoughts on this blog.  And even though I could occasionally pirate a connection from my apartment's office if I put Mona (my laptop) close enough to the window, I still felt helpless. Betrayed.

And I know that I could have gone to Starbucks.  To another coffee shop.  I could have gone to my restaurant, sat in a booth & gotten free drinks and food. 

But people kept promising me the internet. 

Time Warner (bastards) promised to come by on Friday between 2 and 5.  So of course I had to stay home waiting for their arrival.  They didn't come. 

A new company promised me the fastest internet in existence, & they overnighted me the equipment.  But then for some reason, I couldn't install their software onto my computer, and of course, after three hours of tech support, they realized it’s a problem they’ve never seen before.  It needed to be escalated to the next level.  Someone will contact me.  One day.

Then Marcus & Mom-to-be invited me on their trip to their family’s country in Arkansas with the allure that there is internet there.   I hadn't been seeing him a lot lately anyway, so I agreed to go.

Guess what?  There was no internet.

So I was forced to delight in the peacefulness of the country.  To spend time with my loving Mom & Dad-to-be.  To get to know practically all of Marcus's wild & kind aunts, uncles & cousins.  And when he wasn't hunting, I was forced to enjoy surprising & charming moments with the father of my child.

It was quite an adventure.  So much so, that I think I'll tell you more about it the next few times I write.

I was going to give you a preview, but I'm using that pirated connection, and it's slow. 

Yes, I still don't have the internet.  But I'm not so mad about it anymore.  Because of the fun times I had in its absence.